Death of a Dream?

As many of you know, I’ve longed for a backyard writing shed for years. I’ve had a recurring dream since my 30’s of a peaceful, tranquil, creative space, all my own.

I visualized a little cottage-type shed, with white shiplap on the peaked ceilings and gauzy curtains blowing in the gentle breeze. My magical space had a built-in bookcase on the back wall, a comfy chair and-a-half tucked into one corner and my desk positioned in the center. Funny thing was that the little shed stood in the middle of the woods, in a beautiful, green-grassed meadow. Obviously, my dream embellished my backyard just a smidge!

I’ve coveted she-sheds of all shapes and sizes. I’ve coveted old sheds and new sheds. I even have a board for them all on Pinterest.

Some of my very favourites:

 

So, so, beautiful, right?

My dream writing space has always represented something tangible to me; a creative place where the words would flow naturally from my brain, to my hand, onto the page. They would flow so easily.

Now, in my 60’s, I still poke around online, looking for that perfect little she-shed. As luck would it, I found one! If it wasn’t perfect, it was near perfect.

Isn’t that cute? Someone was selling this little gem. I loved the tiny wooden porch, the outdoor lights and the scuffed-up door. I was pretty excited, and bonus: we wouldn’t even have to build it! It was already insulated, wired and ready to go. It was a good size – 8′ x 12′ and was located fairly close to our home. Movers were ready and available to move it to my backyard right away. Sounds perfect?

I thought about it for at least a week. I looked at the online photos of the shed every day, inside and outside. I went out into our backyard with my tape measure and paced out the size. Then, I did it again and again. Coming back into the house, I walked down the steps into my basement studio. Taking stock of everything I already had available to me. . . the light and space and comfort I had access to. . . I decided against purchasing this little, sweet, shed.

For days, it felt like “my dream was dead”. After all those years of thinking about my own little workspace, it was so hard to drop it. But, I realized this dream of mine had surfaced long ago, when our kids were young and space was at a premium in our home. I also realized there was no magical place where words would flow easily. Writing is not easy – it’s hard – no matter where you hang your hat.

In my home studio, I have space for my fabrics, my files and my desk. I have storage for scrapbooking supplies and finished photo books. It’s a warm and cozy space in the winter and cool and comfortable in the summer. I do have peace and quiet to write and quilt.

Things change. Life circumstances, mindsets and dreams all change.

My new dream is that I will become an (older!) published book author. Better late than never.

Kim